No complaining week: A few thoughts.

I've been thinking a lot about complaining and negativity since my week of no complaining officially ended on Sunday. Of course I didn't make it through the entire week without a complaint, but I did spend an entire week being a lot more aware of the things that come out of my mouth.

First, complaining definitely has its place. That place, for me, is cheap therapy. I've mentioned before that I process the world through my mouth, and need to talk about pretty much everything. So if I'm unhappy about something, I like to talk about it (AKA complain) until it makes more sense. But at the same time, I don't think I necessarily feel much better or happier after complaining, so it seems like there has to be a better way. Right, guys?

My biggest discovery is that I don't seem to be a big complainer around other people. Phew! But the downside to that is that I seem to save up a days' worth of complaints for when Nick gets home from work. And then I proceed to dump every thought I've had in the past 9 hours on him, good or bad. And if I don't have much to complain about from my day, I seem to find them! We got the BYU alumni magazine in the mail last week, and I was casually flipping through it while we were waiting for dinner to finish. In the process I found an article that apparently didn't meet my high literary standards, which I informed Nick of at length. Halfway through haughtily sniffing at a caption, I suddenly clasped my hand over my mouth and gasped "Oh no! I'm complaining!" Nick just kind of smiled and shrugged like "you didn't figure that out 10 minutes ago?" So, I'd really, really like to to try to break the habit of unloading all of my complaining and negativity on the one person I love the most.

The world of blogging tells me that it seems I'm not the only one trying to break the habit. Katy of No Big Dill and Joslyn of Simple Lovely have both written recently about complaining and the need to just put a sock in it and quit whining. And my goodness, couldn't we all benefit from a little less bellyaching in the world? Maybe I should try saying one positive thing for every negative thing that I say?

This is definitely a "back-to-the-drawing-board" project that is going to take a bit more thought, and a lot more practice. Until then, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Come back on Friday for a little giveaway, and if you just can't wait until then for more Tamsin, check out the massive post I wrote for Me Here Mer There.

Comments

  1. I think it's admirable you even tried. :) But I have to say, there is a definite difference between the nit picking complaining, and the "complaining" that every mother must do at some point. I agree with what you said, sometimes talking it out makes it better. I know that most of my irritation is irrational, and when I express that irritation (hopefully to myself) I can see where I went wrong. Anyway, I love your experiment.

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  2. I'm really really going to try, lovely people don't moan and I want to be lovely, x

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  3. Its SUPER hard to not complain, especially to the ones you love. They are, afterall, the ones who know you best and will listen. I notice I do the same to Jasper some days, but we take turns complaining! haha

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  4. Tamsin, never, ever, ever, ever, ever be afraid to criticize the BYU alumni magazine. It's so terrible that I think part of the reason they send it out is to make sure we're still smart enough to see how bad it truly is. :)

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