I spent Thursday trying to be my very best and shiniest self, and living up to my own expectations.
It was kind of hard - and extremely productive.
I started the day by getting up and taking care of Espen. Which, of course, I do every day. But, instead of multitasking our time away by checking my email and reading blogs (always the blogs!) while I fed him, I just stroked his hand, made eye contact and sang some songs. This is all stuff I usually do anyway, but My Best Self manages to focus on one thing at a time. And My Best Self had that one right, it was really nice to just pay attention to Espen and remind both of us how important our time together is. So that is highly repeatable and something I'll try again.
Next, after putting Espen back to bed for a nap, My Best Self informed me that she is the kind of girl who likes to get some exercise in the mornings, and not just think about it woefully before squeezing in a quick nap. The fact that I can't actually leave my house during Espen's nap time was no excuse for her, she just pointedly looked at the Wii Fit balance board and politely reminded me that it was, after all, purchased as a fun way to get a little workout into our day.
Naturally, she was right. I did a 30 minute work out, got all hot and sweaty and felt all kinds of good after moving around a bit. My Best Self also got a new high score for her Warrior Pose and step aerobics, because that's just the kind of girl she is.
Then I hopped in the shower, where My Best Self reminded me that it was probably time for me to shave my legs, and won't it be nice to be a smooth-legged and summery? And it was. My normal self often forgets or decides that it takes too long, but she was overruled.
After showering, I actually blow dried my hair and put on make up! Then I got dressed, and, as a quick inside joke with myself, put on my pearl necklace. If I was going to look that cute at 10 AM with only Espen to see me (and he thinks I'm fantastic at 3 AM when I'm half-asleep and half-dressed), I may as well go all the way.
The rest of the day passed in cleaning, blogging ("you can't let yourself get too far behind!"), taking care of Espen and doing laundry. My Best Self is very productive and knows how to get things done! She also knows how important it is to drop everything to crawl around on the floor with Espen, sing songs and practice sitting up with him. I like that about her.
My Best Self had intended to make a lovely meal for Nick when he got home from work, but ended up being thwarted by having the A/C repair guy show up right at prime cooking time. This is when my Pragmatic Self popped her head in and said: "Guess what, friends? We are ordering pizza." And I like that about her.
In the evening, after Espen had gone to sleep, my Best Self went outside and weeded and watered the garden. My regular self has looked out of the window at those weeds for weeks and not done anything about them. And when it was time to slow down and relax, My Best Self put down the laptop, and skooched over to the other end of the couch to watch a movie while snuggled up to Nick. Because he likes to have her attention, and she likes to give it to him, rather than playing solitaire or melting her brain on Facebook. My regular self often forgets that and was glad of the reminder.
A few thoughts about My Best Self:
She knows what's up, she gets things done and she does them right. She is hard working and conscientious. She tries hard to be aware of the needs and feelings of others, and really wants and tries to act in their best interest.
On the flip side, she is also highly motivated by guilt, and mostly does things because they "should" be done, rather than because they are things that she would like to do. As a result, she gets very tired from continuously pushing and pushing through one thing after another to get them done. She couldn't take naps even if she tried, because she just lies there feeling guilty about everything she should be doing instead. Plus, if she spends too much time around here, pushing and pushing to get things done and done right, I get anxious and highly strung about all of the other things that not even My Best Self has gotten around to doing yet. And, outside of relationships, My Best Self spends very little time doing anything silly or selfish.
And... insert your own obvious paragraph about finding balance and allowing oneself to be a complete person.